Should I stay or Should I go?
by H. K. Cullen
Summary: Oneshot! 'I sat in my room, crying, watching the rain hit against my windows. Oh, god, what have I done? How many people have I hurt? Alice, Carlisle, Charlie, Renee, Esme, Rosalie, Jasper, Emmett... Edward.' Summary Change
1. Leaving You

**_Author's Note: This is probably just going to be a one shot. Got bored, got sick, reread Twilight, typed this. _**

**_No I do not own the rights to Twilight, or New Moon. Are you that stupid enough to ask me?_**

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Bella P.O.V.

I sat in my room, crying, watching the rain hit against my windows. Oh, god, what have I done? How many people have I hurt? Alice, Carlisle, Charlie, Renee, Esme, Rosalie, Jasper, Emmett... Edward.

The tears wouldn't stop, nothing I could do would make them stop. Only one person, one vampire, could help me, and I had broken him. He offered me his heart and soul, and all I said was 'no'. It wasn't right, it was cruel, even Charlie had been aware of that and he almost hated Edward. Everyone was against me, they couldn't see, couldn't understand.

Of course I still loved Edward, I loved him with all my heart, but I cannot be with him. I can't marry him, I can't have him thinking that he damned me. It would have killed me, I love him too much, which is why I'm going.

I dragged myself across the room, to my closet. I knew Charlie would be upset which is why I have to leave within the next ten minutes. I had hidden a suitcase for a worst case scenario, this seemed like as good as time as ever to use it. I had clothes, food, money, my passport, a cell phone **_(one of those go-phones)_**, and a photoalbum. With pictures of those of whom I loved and trusted.

"I'n so sorry, this is the only way" I whispered to myself, knowing that not even Edward could hear me. I should leave a note for him, I should but I won't. It would be best this way, after all wasn't it him who had said "a clean break"?

I made my way downstairs, trying to make the least noise possible. Thinking that I was in the clear I walked down the last step, the last step which was the first to trip me. I couldn't help myself even if I wanted to, I fell (face first I might add) on to the carpet ahead of me. At least there wasa carpet otherwise...

I heard Charlie grunt from the sofa, he'd fallen asleep watching baseball. It was such a normal thing for Charlie to do, he'd wake up check to see if I were asleep in my room, then head to his room and sleep some more. He had done that so many times for the past year or so that it was all old news. Except for today, today when he'd go to check on me he would find only a note on top of my pillow. This note held only four words:

_Goodbye dad,_

_Love Bells_

I kissed his forehead and muttered a soft, "goodbye." I won't come back to Forks, I won't go back to Edward, I won't hurt anyone else after this.

I knew where I would go- Italy. I know who I would see- Aro. I know what I would ask of him- immortality. If Edward won't change me, none of the Cullen's will either, they all loved Edward too much. Even if they had promised, what was a promise of friendship compared to a promise of love?

I reached m truck, realizing the major fault in my plan that I had overlooked- the noise of my truck. Surely it would wake up Charlie, even he wasn't that heavy of a sleeper. I had only three options now, give up, steal Charlie's police cruiser, or take my truck and don't give a fuck about whether or not I wake him up.

I think I'll go with option three, it seemed the most rational. Since, obviously, I had to rule out option number one. No, there would be no number one, giving up is not an option. I had been planning this escape since the night that they had all voted on my immortality. Even when the outcome was yes; I knew.

I opened the door to the truck, throwing my stuff into passenger seat. As I put the key in the ignition I felt an unnatural breeze fly past me. I stiffened, knowing the exact cause of this. Edward.

"Bella! What the hell are you doing?!" His voice was angry, his eyes were angry, **_he_** was angry. I knew he was only going to get angrier but I just remained silent. "Well? Answer me, what are you doing?"

"I'm leaving." I looked at his eyes, they'd frozen over. He looked as if he had died (no pun intended), or as if someone he had loved dearly had died... Either way, he was upset.

"Wh-what?" He asked, stunned.

"I said; I'm leaving. I just, I can't deal with it anymore Edward. I stil love you, I just... I'm not staying." Now Edward has misinterpereted what I had said, which I intened him to do. See if he thought that I meant I'm not staying human he really wouldn't let me leave.

"Bella, don- don't go. Please, I've lived enough without you. You've seen what happened, you know how much I love you... Why?!" Edward seemed to be on the verge of tears, if that were eve npossible for vampires which it's not, it killed me. But I knew what I was doing was right, maybe this what Edward thought when he left me.

"Edward, why, why? Because, I already told you why! Please don't make this any harder than it is, you have no idea Edward. No idea, I love you, but you need to let me go." A silent tear slid down my cheek, I was heart broken... but this time it wasn't Edward's doing, it was all me.

"Let you go?" He spoke softly, his perfect lips barely moving. More tears swept past my cheeks as I watched him repeat "Let you go," over and over again. It reminded me of what I had been like, saying repeatingly, "He's gone."

"Goodbye Edward, I need to leave to make my flight." I tried to make my voice stern but failed miserably. Even so, Edward walked away from my truck, gave me one last glance, and ran.

Left alone I started my truck and drove to Port Angeles airport where I purchased a oneway ticket to Italy. I would have sworn that the first time I took this flight it was longer. _I guess time moves by when your having fun,_ I thought sarcastically.

I stared out of the plane's window, thinking, remembering. I was thinking of all the memories Edward and I had shared, there would be no more. This was the end.


	2. Dead Sorry

Hey i just wanted to say that this story is dead...

I'm really sorry but I just can't see it going anywhere.

Soo, I'm going to delete chapt. 2 and leave it as a oneshot.

So yeah, this fanficdead   
Other fanfic not dead

oh and if you have read Her Name is Isabella Swan I should update on Halloween, I'm editing it now.

Sorry fans of Should I stay or Should I go? I kinda like the ending- it leaves more to the imagination!

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LOVE

H.K.Cullen


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